We get e-mails all the time, and we just had someone ask if it is OK to take care of things yourself? The following is my friend Graeme’s response to one of those e-mails that I think was excellent.
The real question is, what do you want to do? The bible does not specifically say “Thow Shalt Not Masturbate!” If you are looking for a reason to masturbate, don’t! Just masturbate! All things are permissible! God will not get mad at you and kick you off the island. It is your right to masturbate all you want and you won’t lose your Christianity. In fact God loves you so much, you can not out masturbate God!
The problem with masturbation is, it is a poor substitute for intimacy with another person… a poor substitute with none of the difficulties. You get a very similar endorphin rush without the risk or hassle of including another person… Intimacy is only for the brave. To be intimate with another person requires their involvement, which requires you to be brave and take a chance, hoping you won’t get rejected. The inability to properly deal with rejection is the no. 1 reason men end up addicted to sex. Now on the other hand, [excuse the pun] your hand will never reject you so there is no risk.Masturbation destroys your motivation to pursue intimacy with another person. Your hormones were created to drive you toward intimacy, to bring you together with your mate. Circumventing that on a regular basis, compromises your innate need to find a mate, and ultimately prolongs your single lifestyle. Masturbation also contributes to your inability to connect to the opposite sex because making love has no similarity to masturbation. A couple in the midst of having sex are passionately giving to each other, unselfishly holding back their ejaculation for the partner so that the other might enjoy the orgasm equally. Then there is the matter of how tight your hand is in comparison to the vagina! This creates false expectations and ultimate disillusionment with the act of sex. Most single men will continue masturbating after marriage to control their experience, avoid rejection and fulfill their expectations of what an orgasm should feel like. This ultimately leading to isolation from their wives. This is isolation, quite frankly is the root of a divisive spirit. Did you know that in almost all divorces today, sexual addiction plays a major role in the decision? So if you want to, just do it then let me know how it works out for you. You may be the one person in the world that it works out for. All things are permissible, but not everything is beneficial.
Graeme J Morris