How intimate is intimate? The bible speaks very clearly about this. It says [somewhere] when it talks about a man and a women laying together… that they “knew” each other… It also says that there is no greater joy than fully knowing someone and being fully known. This is a profound look at what intimacy is. To know the Father in His fullness and to be known by Him is everything. David modeled this and we can see the fruit it produced in his life.
Recently I was contemplating my friendship with Mark Peterson. I realized that intimacy had become a normal thing for us. A deep intimacy I have longed for since I can remember. This comes in human form very rarely for me. I am making it my goal to find it more often now, because I am completely changed because of that level of intimacy. How much more will I be changed by even deeper levels of intimacy with the Father. This is my goal, to fully know the Father. He already fully knows me.
We model first in the natural relationships what we are to be like in the spiritual. This gives us great practice for intimacy. Danny Silk says that intimacy is Into-me-you-see cause I showed you. I think he is right. This moves beyond the first levels of communication, beyond cliche’s, facts, opinions, and right to the vulnerable stage of feelings and needs. What is it we feel and what do we need? When we practice sharing our feelings and needs openly without expectation from the other party, we open ourselves up to being intimate with another.
Then what is the problem? Why do we struggle with intimacy? Because rejection happens the deepest at this level. Imagine after you share you feelings and needs, the other party laughs or worse uses it against you? This level of rejection can be tough. This is the same rejection we experienced during our formative years at the same time we were developing physically. This rejection is plaguing men all over the world, as they turn to masturbation as a poor substitute for true intimacy.
It is time for us to take a long hard look at who our intimate friends really are. Who is it that who truly knows you on the inside? Can you name those you know fully? Are you practicing unconditional intimacy even in the face of rejection? I venture to say that real men run toward the sword that is intimacy and you can tell by their fruit. You can tell because they are surrounded with the wealth that is deep friendships. It has been my goal for a while now to increase the depth of my friendships and the amount of deep friends I have. I am a rich man, but I am challenging my capacity for intimacy, because it is a direct reflection of my ability to get intimate with the Father.
Thanks for reading, hope these thought I am having help you.