Porn is lie. So I started writing down all the lies that porn tells us. I came up with some, then I asked a few of my friends for help. Here is the list we came up with.
1. This is how sex really is.
2. This is how women like sex.
3. Real men have a big penis.
4. Women are turned on the same way men are.
5. Sex is a way to win, conquer, and score.
6. A woman’s value is determined by how she looks.
7. Porn will fulfill your need.
8. You’ll feel better after you watch it.
9. You can stop anytime you want to.
10. This is how everyone has sex.
11. I matter if I look at it.
12. Sex in marriage is boring.
13. That i am somebody, even if you say i’m not. (Gives me a sense of worth).
14. There’s no rejection with porn. So I guess the lie is that porn is safer (less damaging) than real relationship.
15. Stress relief. Porn was the only solution that could relieve it
16. it’s better than actual sex because of the control you can have
17. looking at porn doesn’t hurt anyone else except ourselves.
18. It’s my only safe place.
19. I’m ok when I look at porn.
20. I know my needs like no one else and porn will meet those needs.
21. There is something wrong with me…. I can’t tell anyone.
22. This mess is all my fault. I’ll never get free, so why try.
23. My pain will stop if I look one more time.
24. I am not sure I want to stop.
25. It’s all I have. It would be worse to have nothing.
26. At least I can control the outcome with porn. I’m in charge.
27. My penis is too small.
28. Women are nymphomaniacs that just want sex.
29. Women are objects.
30. We are basically animals.
31. Sex is only physical.
32. Intimacy is physicality.
33. Sex is basically pounding a women’s body parts.
34. Sex is an act of aggression.
35. An orgasm depends on furious friction not intimate connection.
36. Real women are prudish, and connecting with them is impossible.
37. I feel/exist through my penis. If my penis feels good I feel good.
38. Real human emotions are scary, sex is the antidote.
39. I will be self actualized through porn.
40. I can be sexual in isolation.
41. It is impossible to be powerful in the present better to be distracted in fantasy.
42. Women like big penises.
43. My wife can never satisfy me like these women can.
44. Looking at porn is safe.
45. Viewing porn isn’t sin.
45. I’m a loser anyways so I will just look at porn and masturbate.
46. Porn is just recreational.
Part of getting better is recognizing what isn’t true, so you can begin to live in what is. If you would like to add to this list submit the lies that porn has told you in the comments below and we’ll happily approve them for others to read.
A great way to begin to change your way of thinking is to say out loud what is true instead of the lie you believe. It’s best done in a small group or with friends. I call them repeatafterme’s. For instance if I recognize that a man in my small group believes that porn will fulfill his need. I will say “repeat after me. Jesus will fulfill my need.” It seems a little lame and simple but it’s a powerful tool. Our words hold the power of life and death. So speak life giving words out load and break the lie. I cannot count the hundreds of times I have seen men cry when they repeat a truth over a lie they believe. I know, I am one of them myself. Love rejoices in truth, so say it. Believe it. Live out of it. It will set you free.